Sorry I Am Not Sorry For Being A Lazy Blogger.

Enjoy some linkage.

Were you a child of the 80s? Two words: Polly Pockets. CLICK!

Do you judge the attractiveness of men by their shoes? CLICK!

I bought this shirt last night. In case you can’t read it, it says “Everyone talks about my BLOG.” With a price tag of $7.99 HOW COULD I RESIST!? IT IS SO HIDEOUS! Just like my face last night. I had just come from Body Step and have no make up on. You like?!

Exercises to strengthen your choo choo? WTH? CLICK!

I almost peed my jeans when I saw this:

Don’t ask me why I’m wearing jeans when it’s 400 degrees in Charleston today.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Brownies! You’re going to drool all over your laptop/desktop/ipad/other stupid internet browsing device. CLICK! 

Toning exercises you can do at your desk. (I just bounce around in my chair a lot, but whatever, here ya go.) CLICK!

Happy Friday!

I Am Not Your Most Stable Friend. I Am Your Clumsiest Friend.

Before going out for Trista’s birthday on Friday night, I jokingly sent this picture message to TJ and Tyler.

“Accident waiting to happen?”

Tyler’s response: “Yes, but totally worth it.

TJ’s response: “Christastrophe.”

What I didn’t realize is that this picture message was an omen for the evening. Silas and I went to Trista’s party, then to Midtown, then to Trio to dance. Obviously I haven’t finished reading Classy.
Fast forward several hours later…I woke up in the middle of the night freaking out. I thought my foot was broken. I could not walk on it, or put any pressure on it for that matter. It was awful. I took an Aleve and tried to go back to sleep. When I woke up in the morning, it felt even worse, so I texted my old roommate/nursing student Diana. She graciously offered to take me to the urgent care clinic to get an x-ray.
Right around the corner from us is Nason Medical Center. This place is awesome. The entire staff was very friendly and made sure we were comfortable and happy throughout our entire visit. After doing paperwork, Diana and I noticed a refreshment area with complimentary beverages and snacks. Cha ching!
Once we were called back, they took my vitals. My blood pressure was 140/70. Um, yeah, I was in pain. Just a few minutes later, Dr. Schwartzberg arrived. A Jewish doctor – everything was going to be fine. I told him I had been dancing like a tramp but spared him the details of keg beer and tequila. Then they took an x-ray to make sure no bones were broken.


No broken bones! Apparently it was just a really bad strain and I needed a fiberglass foot brace, pain meds, and crutches. Hottest I’ve ever been.

After the visit, Diana brought me to Publix to fill my prescription and get food/goodies because I wouldn’t be driving anytime soon. Wine was definitely purchased. We had a blast roaming around Publix in this hot motorized vehicle. It even made an obnoxious beeping noise while in reverse.
That evening, Diana came back over for a fire, wine, m&ms, and a movie. We watched my doppelganger in Letters to Juliet – cute, but super cheesy. I am so thankful for having such a sweet friend take care of me all day. Thank you, Diana – love love love you!

I have iced my foot several times, kept it elevated, and am hobbling around in crutches. I feel like such a goof, but am so happy that I didn’t break any bones. I think I am more upset about not going to the gym! Today I am going to decorate my crutches with ribbons, stickers, and maybe even bedazzle it. Gotta make the best of life’s accidents!


What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? What did you do during recovery?

Out With the Old, In With the New

This morning Nikki and I went to Hominy Grill for brunch. The restaurant, located downtown on Rutledge St., is in a shabby old building dating back to the 1880s. The clapboard walls, tin ceilings and hardwood floors give the former barbershop a very homey, antique feeling. 

The menu has traditional Southern fare, with pancakes, french toast, eggs, buttermilk biscuits, and of course, grits. You may recognize Hominy Grill from Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations when he devoured the "Big Nasty Biscuit": a buttermilk biscuit with fried chicken, cheddar, and sausage gravy.

Aside from the regular menu, the restaurant offers daily specials which are written on chalkboard menus.

If I hadn't just had french toast last weekend, I would have definitely ordered the cinnamon french toast. I instead chose one of their daily specials: black bean, salsa & cheddar omelette with avocado sauce, home fries, and corn bread. 

Hominy Grill has traditional Southern corn bread that is on the drier side with just a hint of sweetness. "Yankee corn bread" is sweeter and more like cake. (Reason #922958725 why I don't mind being called a Yankee. I like my food sweet!) The omelette was pretty good but the avocado sauce kind of freaked me out. I'm 100% sure this was avocado pureed with sour cream. Ick. Here's a picture of the inside:

Nikki had a buttermilk biscuit with egg and cheese and a side of grits.

 

I was in l-o-v-e (ok, maybe lust) with her biscuit. I think I ate more of it than she did. It was so moist and crumbly. We both thought the grits had a great texture but needed salt. Here is a picture of us outside the restaurant, photographed by a stranger who obviously doesn't know the rule of thirds. Our poor hands got chopped!

After brunch we stopped by Dillard's to exchange my beloved Michael Kors watch. I used to own this baby:

Pretty, right? Well, that "gold" you see started wearing off after only 2 months. Not so pretty. I exchanged it for the all silver so I wouldn't look so ghetto-fab.

This watch means serious business. Not only is it about as large as my head, but I could probably clock someone with it....haha GET IT? Oh and did you guys know I was a magician?
Now you see it...

Now you don't! 

I've got tricks.


News in my boudoir: nope, not a man, just new paint & furniture. A couple weeks ago I decided to paint my wall green. Are you at all surprised that I chose a color called Guacamole green?

 A week later, my bed arrived. Reason #298579284 why it's cool to have muscles: you can put beds together! 

I started this project the other night and good heavens it was a chore. So many nuts, bolts, and washers.

My roommate walked in right as I started and pointed out that I was building it upside down. Thank goodness he wanted to help. It took us about 30 minutes to do the frame:

Another 30 minutes later we were done!

Now I'm off to take a nap on my favorite food book. I hope that by some miraculous diffusion process I absorb some of this information. According to Boding, diffusion is "the transfer of particles, specifically ions and nutrients, from one permeable membrane to another permeable membrane." Sure. Let's just hope that diffusion is real so I wake up a better cook. 

OH YES I sleep smiling!! No wine like last time. After my diffusion nap, my friend Kelly and I are going out to dinner where we will hopefully run into 5-10 available men. That should be enough! ;)

Like Scrambled Eggs with Hot Sauce

Nah, no real eggs in this post, but it will be all scrambled and definitely full of spice.

Last night I went to my second yoga class with my friend Natalie. This particular class was called "Hot Vinyasa Flow." I'm not really in the mood to write in paragraph form today, so let's discuss this class using a list. 

My thoughts:

1. They're not kidding when they say hot. Walking in was like crossing the border over into Mexico and leaving was like stepping into an Arctic so cold that I may have hallucinated a penguin.

2. I made the mistake of placing my mat by a man again. Last time a man sat next to me and sweated half his life out. Last night's man made it a point to tell me, "We might be touching a lot." Wait, what? Did I sign up for foreplay 101? NO. Stay in your rectangle, please!! Random people touching me is my worst nightmare! Please think of me like a pretty fish aquarium, stare all you want but do not poke!

3. The music was pretty, but slow. If I was a pot smoker, I definitely would have called Lil Wayne and asked him to join me for a sesh.

4. Two of the guys in the class wore board shorts. I've seen this in the gym too. Like, what are you thinking dudes? I know it's hot as heck in this gym, but there is no sand or waves -- we are not at the beach!! 

5. I am 100% sure that I could have bounced a quarter off the instructor's behind.

6.When the class got really quiet, I could hear Britney Spears playing in the main gym. I shed a tear. Then I heard men's voices. I shed 50 tears.

7. The class was an hour and fifteen minutes. My a.d.d. doesn't like anything over an hour.

8. I have never seen my body so covered in sparkly sweat. Yeah, my sweat sparkles!

9. How on earth do people do headstands? Isn't that like asking to break your own neck? The one position I felt comfortable in was a back bend, because I did gymnastics growing up. One girl went from a back bend back into a headstand. Who is she!?

10. How many times can you do a downward dog? So inapprope.

So, I have mixed feelings about yoga. Like I said before, I'd do it again, but I don't love it. I'm energetic and have trouble keeping quiet, so I need something not so....peaceful? Next Tuesday I'm cheating on my gym and going to East Shore for Erica's Body Attack class. I checked out LesMills.com and here is why I know I'm in for some fun:

1. Erica is the instructor. I have much love for her. By some mathematical property, I will love the class.

2. The description: "BODYATTACK™ is a 55-minute sports-inspired cardio workout that’s all about improving your speed, fitness, strength and agility." I spy the word 55-minute. I'm smiling.

3. Songs on the tracklist include: "Sexy Chick" and "I Know You Want Me." Confidence boost? I think so.

4. The class is called Body Attack. I love attacking (a man's) body.

So exciting! I can't wait to let you all know how it goes and will hopefully snap some hot before and after pics. Or should I say super cool before and insanely hot after pics?

In other news, I'd like to share a slew of photos that I have taken on my phone. The older I get, the more I realize that I am a weird person and really strange things seems to appear in front of me all the time. How about another list?

1. I only know how to wear highlighter colors to the gym:

2. These people dress worse than me:

3. I make normal things inappropriate at the grocery store:

4. I like putting my clothing on dogs.

Happy Wednesday to my beautiful readers!!

My birthday is in 7 days!