The Most Disgusting Blog Post I’ve Ever Written

As a food blogger, it should come as no surprise that I daydream about food. It will surprise you, though, that I often daydream about food that I cannot have. And by cannot, I mean should not ever. I see so many blog posts called “What I Ate Wednesday” but thought I’d twist that idea into something rather, well, disgusting.

Welcome to the inside of my (crazy) head. Here’s what I secretly would eat if nutrition wasn’t a concern.

1. Chef Boyardee Spaghetti & Meatballs.  I know. You just gagged, didn’t you? Growing up, I spent most weekends at my Grammy’s house. When we’d go grocery shopping, I always picked up a can of these. Ugh. 

2. Lucky Charms

And no, I wouldn’t just pick out the marshmallows. I love it all.

3. Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream

This is one of their best flavors. It’s a “collision of Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Creams with HEATH® Bar Chunks, White Chocolatey Chunks, Peanut Butter Cups & Chocolatey-Covered Almonds.” Cruel, just cruel.

4. Hawaiian Sweet Maui Onion potato chipsThese things are so freaking good. You can find them at World Market.

5. Dunkaroos!

Remember when I found these at Wal-Mart last fall? Yeah, I almost peed my pants out of excitement. They were only $2 to boot.

6. Oatmeal Crème Pies and Cosmic Brownies by Little Debbie

These two are just shameful. In high school, Nancy and I would destroy a box of Cosmic Brownies. They’re so fudgey.

7. Ellio’s Pepperoni Pizza

I also ate this as a child. Something about the rectangular shape excites me.

8. Curly Fries…especially if they’re spicy.

Do I just love these for the curl? When I did eat these, I remember getting oh so excited for the ones that were super long. And of course I loved them because I could drown them in ketchup.

9. Cadbury Mini Eggs

Besides peanut and pretzel m&ms, this is my favorite candy. It’s not even quality chocolate but I love the taste of the candy shell. Plus, they make me happy because they’re pastel.

10. and my very favorite, Funfetti cake!!!

Well guys, now that I’ve disgusted you,  it’s time for me to go and eat my kale.

Sigh.

What would YOU eat if the nutrition/ingredients didn’t matter? Be honest! You know you want some boxed cake too.

Do you ever indulge in these taboo foods?

You May Think I Am Disgusting For This.

…and that is okay, because I think I’m disgusting for this too.

I mentioned the other day that my new coworker loves pickles as much as I do. One morning last week, she was telling me how she couldn’t find her coffee mug before work and had to take her coffee to work in something else.

She grabbed and filled an empty pickle jar. With her coffee. Now that is what I call recycling in style.

Later that afternoon, she told me she had a surprise for me. A pickle snack for us!

While chomping away on our afternoon snack, we started perusing the Mt. Olive website. Not only did we find out that they were having a pickle festival in NC that weekend, but that there is a part of the site dedicated to pickle recipes. I immediately clicked the “dessert” category, but alas, there were no recipes. Elizabeth declared that we could surely come up with a recipe and within five minutes she had one. Pickle juice popsicles.

Now most people would laugh that off, or maybe even vomit, but I thought it was a genius idea.  As soon as I got off work I drove to Target to buy popsicle molds. Lucy came home just as I started making them and needless to say, she was confused.

I chopped up a pickle into small bits,

tossed them into the molds and poured in some pickle juice.

Once the molds were in place,

I stuck them in the freezer to be ready for the next day.

At work the next morning, I surprised Bess with the popsicles. We were so excited to try them, despite our fears that we might smell for the rest of the day. The verdict? They were SOUR. So sour. But goooood.

And few hours later, I messaged my friend Lauren asking her how she felt about pickle popsicles. She wanted one too, so I brought her one. And she liked it!

I can’t believe I was actually in an elevator and walking down the hall carrying this. Can I get a shame filter?

Would you ever eat a pickle juice popsicle? What’s your favorite popsicle flavor?

Can we call these picksicles?

Rolling Around in a Giant Blue Ball. A 51” Blue Ball.

Before I get started on how I ridiculously spent my Saturday, here is Photo Day 3: A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

The Golden GirlsI.love.those.ladies.

Saturday:

I was supposed to run 432 errands, but instead did the two most important ones: go to the bank and the library. I quit doing errands when Matt texted me saying, “I’m ready to play now.”

We went to lunch at Three Little Birds Café & Catering in West Ashley. The little café is located in the Windermere Plaza behind Earthfare. The menu contains both breakfast items, sandwiches, soups, salads, smoothies, and fresh juices. I ordered the a turkey sandwich with avocado, tomato, sprouts, Swiss cheese, and a black bean spread on Tuscan bread. I had a side of sweet potato home fries.



We also stopped by Costco for some essentials: broccoli, toilet paper, and inflatable toys.
We found this and contemplated buying it for like 3 whole minutes until we decided to split it. Matt said, “I mean seriously, we are 26 years old and buying inflatable toys.” The packaging clearly states that this toy is for 3 years old and up and holds up to 150 pounds. Hmm…I fit.
Before going home, we went to Earthfare and picked up a 6-pack of Corona. No way was I rolling around in that thing without a bev. Pumping it up took less than 10 minutes and then it was time to roll.
The hardest part was getting in the ball.And also not tipping over. Once I was in, Matt rolled/kicked me around. He pretty  much abused me to the point where I was squealing to get out. I love having my guy friends because they are protective but they can also be so abusive!Miserable.
Matt then thought it was a good time to wash his car.And also me. I would have killed him had it not been 77 degrees out.Later, Graham and Brett came home and tried out the ball. How this thing didn’t pop, I’m still not sure. They were seriously running and body slamming the thing to knock each other.
After oh, say, 30 minutes of this, Brett put together an awesome video of the clips I had taken. Watch this!!