Mar 21, 2010

The Most Inapprop Post Ever...NSFW!!

Friday's 5:30 therapy session: Whole Foods. Mission: Cheese. I frolicked over to my 2nd favorite section to buy a cheese that Jenna and I tried last week. We literally had a cheese party with two of the workers who let us try 9 different kinds. My intention was to go back for the Cave Aged Gruyere. It is a hard cow cheese from Switzerland that has been aged for a year in underground caves. It has an intense, smooth flavor with little salt crystals throughout. I picked up a slab and then asked the cheeseman about another one we tried: Robiola. Unfortunately they were out of Robiola. Cheeseman came around the corner saying, "We might have some next week, but for now, see what you think of this. It's another soft Italian cheese." He whipped out his permanent marker, scribbled on the wheel of cheese and said, "Here ya go, enjoy!" 
In case you didn't know, "N/C" means no charge. No charge for a 1/2 pound of cheese? HAPPY FRIDAY TO ME! I didn't even have to flirt. Now, here's the stuff I paid for:
  • Bananas
  • Pear, for an upcoming amazing sandwich
  • Apples
  • Honey Wheat bread...bc I could smell it through the bag and just had to have it
  • Sweet potato
  • Parsnip, gosh those things are freaky looking
  • Luna Bars
I sliced the sweet potato and parsnip, tossed with olive oil and cinnamon and baked it for...a long time.
I panicked when I realized I didn't have any ketchup and nervously grabbed my favorite Classico four cheese pasta sauce. I ended up grating Pecorino Romano cheese on it...It became 5 cheese!
A hot mess that tasted delish.
Saturday's breakfast was simple but oh so tasty: Sweet & Salty oat bran:
I mustered up the energy to go to the gym 2 hours later. I was deeply concerned about the state of my abs and/or I wanted to work up an appetite for lunch...which was out of this world. I headed over to Village Bakery for a daily special. Village Bakery is a cute little breakfast/lunch place on Pitt St. in Mt. Pleasant. It's in the same restaurant family as Mustard Seed, Sette, Boulevard Diner, Longpoint Grill, and Uno Mas. They've got great fresh sandwiches, delicious sides, and a pretty decent breakfast menu, too! They also have a selection of teas and desserts! All of their sandwiches are served on freshly baked bread that you can buy by the loaf. One of my favorite sandwiches from Village Bakery is their Turkey and Provolone sandwich: smoked turkey, provolone, and a cranberry relish. And what they mean by cranberry relish is fresh cranberries that have been simmered in orange juice and sugar. Yum. 

Saturday's special was "Balsamic roasted chicken, baby spinach, mozzarella, with a sun-dried tomato basil aioli served hot on a ciabatta roll."
Look at that ooey gooey cheese madness.
As my side I chose the Irish salad: wheat berries with bits of cabbage, potatoes, and corned beef. This was interesting and great!
I washed it all down with a Zevia Black Cherry. This flavor has some kick! Great stuff. 

And now it's time for the Not Safe For Work part of this post. Drum roll, please...
Yes, people, this is real life in the Ethnic section of Publix. I shamelessly snapped a picture of this with my Blackbaby and immediately proceeded to message this to as many BBM contacts as possible.

Reactions:
Aaron: Oh my..
Ally: LOL!!!!! Buy me some while you're at it.
Alyssa: Lol - always the most random stuff with you.
Anna: Wtf!? Bahaha. Isn't it like some sort of english pudding crap?
Brandon: What the f is that? It sounds like a disease.
Callie: hahahahah wtf!
David: Hahaha! Wtf is that sgit! Yeah, he spelled it like that.
Erin: Aaron said its an english dessert?
Frankie: That's English bread pudding and I like the name. I'm telling his wife!
Gerry: Get me 2
Heather: No way!!! Lol lol lol. (Me: Should I buy it?) Eww no thanks spotted dicks can't be a good thing.
Nancy: What the f is that!? Better be good!
Heather 2: What the hell is that??
Heera: Wtf!
Laura: Wtf bahahhahaah
Megan: Bahahaah you crack me up!
Nick: I'll take my dick withoout spots, please.
Nikki: wahaahah gross u ate it? 
Santo: That shit looks disgusting! What is that? Are you eating dick tonight? Promise me you'll blog about it. 
Sean: Stay away from that. You could end up with a spotted baby. 
Scott: They make medications for that.
Anonymous: Just call me.


Conclusions:
  • Everybody says wtf. 
  • A lot of people toss in a "b" when laughing
  • I shouldn't buy it.
Whose reaction was your fave? Mine was Santo's. 


Village Bakery Cafe on Urbanspoon

14 comments:

  1. I AM IN LOVE WITH THE MUSTARD SEED! and boulevard diner! AND uno mas! LOVE their ahi tuna tacos! girl you got me so jelous!

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  2. ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! i had the best response! awesome!!!! now i win a meal cooked by christina...let me know when is good for you..k thanks

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  3. hahahahah hilarious. I want to go to Village Bakery- I've never been! On the list. Great buys at WFs and NC? That rocks! I had some parsnips tonight- they are purely awesome. A bit of a funky flavor, but I dig it. Can't wait to meet ya next Sunday!!

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  4. "a lot of people toss in a 'b' when laughing" haaaa. everyone's reactions cracked me up. and you are a lucky bitch for getting free cheese.

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  5. seriously?!?! You are the luckiest girl in the world!! I work in the bread department at a grocery store so I some times get to try things but I've never had that with CHEESE!! I even worked there too (let me tell u a day of working in cheese confuses your palate because you want to try so many!). ENJOY, and I hope you make some cheesey goodness with it! :)

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  6. SIBA/SEBA (Southern Independent Booksellers Alliance) often has chefs with newly published cookbooks at annual conventions.
    One year we had a bread pudding made by Emeril Lagasse. An English author at the dinner did mention that it would be called "Spotted Dick" in England. Emeril was not exceptionally amused. Bam.

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  7. LOL @ your convo ahah!
    and that messy sandwich looks AMAZING. yum.


    xox Vera

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  8. score on the cheese! i am too jealous!!

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  9. All of that cheese looks absolutely WONDERFUL! And the sweet potato and parsnip combo sounds really good too :) I will have to try that for sure!

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  10. i strongly dislike when people throw a "b" in with their laughter. how many people really laugh like that? seriously.

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  11. Oh my goodness, this was an awesome hilarious post. hahaha Your conclusions are absolutely enlightening.

    First of all, daaaang free cheese?? NO WAY!!! You got such a great stash of food! I LOVE when you can smell the bread through the top, except that is actually too tempting for me. I sniff I eat. It's really strange how my reflexes work. hahaha :P

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  12. hahaha
    a) spotted dick.. wtf? that should be an illegal name for a food item
    b) who would eat spotted dick without being like dared into eating it

    FREE CHEESE! AWESOME!

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  13. haha Whoa, I can't believe you can a 1/2 lb of cheese for FREE and also "spotted dick" at the grocery store! What the heck!?

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  14. My daughter was house sitting for an English guy recently and there was a can of spotted dick in the cabinet. FYI...the spots are raisins.

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